Heavenly conductor
So the violinist dies and arrives at the pearly gates. St Peter asks him what he did for a living.
'Played fiddle in the local symphony,' answers the unfortunate soul.
'Excellent,' replies the saint, 'we have an upcoming concert and we can do with some help in the seconds.
The day of the first rehearsal arrives and our hero is sitting nervously in the third desk waiting for God, the conductor, to arrive. God appears and moves (in his normal mysterious ways) to the podium.
'What's He like as a conductor?' the violinists asks his stand partner.
'He's OK, except that He sometimes thinks he's Von Karajan!'

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